Trekkie Alert — We Meet the Vulcans in 50 Years

We are going to make first contact with the Vulcans in exactly 50 years from today (April 5th 2013) and we have work to do to get ready!

Thankfully, the contact we make is with our soon-to-be real good buddies, the Vulcans. This at least takes the pressure off of having to prepare for an armed attack or viral assault. Yes, the Vulcans are coming in exactly 50 years, so let's clean up your yard and get ready to meet the new neighbors.

Our new good buddy Vulcans will land in Central Montana after scanning the warp signature from  Zephram Cochran's experimental warp vessel, the Phoenix. So, that gives us exactly 50 years to get a short list of things done:

Laundry list of "things to do" BEFORE meeting Vulcans:

• Develop warp drive
• Develop a vessel capable of traveling at warp drive
• Find people willing to build and pilot the ship
• Learn the Vulcan salute
• Clean up Central Montana a little... company is coming.

Oh, and somewhere between now and then, we need to have World War III.

Okay, so that's the bad news. We need to have World War III sometime between now and April 5th, 2063. Sorry, but we have to adhere to Star Trek canon for this to work.

Oh, great, the new neighbors play in a band. This sucks! Well, there goes the neighborhood. They'll probably be up till three in the morning jamming, drinking, and partying, while their friend's cars are blocking the driveway. Bet they even have a dog that keeps pooping in your yard, too. Okay, let's stay cool and take the high road. We don't even know these people yet. No doubt they're probably really nice people.

Howdy, neighbor! Let's break out the good china, get out the good booze, the new people on the street are coming over.

Of course, we want to keep up with the Jonses, so be sure to take your smart pills, brush up on your science babble, and try to be at least a little bit on you best behavior. We want to impress these people.