Liquid Lapdance – The Best Strip Club Invention Since the Pole

Strip clubs are supposed to be used for bachelor parties, and maybe the once or twice a year spot to hang out socially with your buddies, but I know there are dudes out there who just aren't satisfied with banging the toothless waiter at the truck stop anymore. So they go to the strip club to try and bust a nut... Unfortunately that usually doesn't happen, until now!! 

Get ready to take your next lap dance to the next level! Liquid Lapdance is the world’s first underwear designed specifically for lap dances. This for men only product actually lubricates the penis and even catches semen. That actually describes some girls I know!

There aren't any pictures that detail what the product looks like, but the invention is essentially something you wear in place of underwear that will enable you you jizz when you get a lap dance.

If you're confused, and want to be even more confused, the NSFW video below explains both explains nothing and everything at the same time. And if you're still hesitant, feel peace of mind with their "World Famous Orgasm Guarantee." No orgasm? No problem! You'll get a full refund for your blue balls.

So how, exactly, does Liquid Lapdance work? Again, kinda vague, but here are the benefits the site promises:

1. They moisturize and lubricate your penis.  A moisturized penis is more sensitive than a dry penis.  As the dancer glides her body over yours, you will feel her much more intensely.  One reviewer described it as the difference between standard and high definition.

2. They provide you with the space to get fully-erect.  Most underwear is not designed to be worn when you're rock hard.  Ours is.  Expand in comfort.

3. They take the pain out of lap dances.  Dry lap dances can be quite painful.  Many guys avoid lap dances for this reason.  Liquid Lapdance takes the pain out of lap dances.  We've tested them with big butts, bony butts and even granny butts!  No pain, our testers still made it rain!  LL is designed for the grind!

4. They contain your semen.  When a guy has an orgasm during a lap dance, it can be quite awkward if he's not wearing Liquid Lapdance.  A wet stain typically forms on the guy's crotch, and semen may get on the dancer, where it is often unwelcome.  With Liquid Lapdance, you can relax and fully-enjoy the orgasm without worrying about minimizing or containing ejaculation as you might in regular underwear.

 

Three packs are available for $36. There's also a Stelth Mode packaging option designed to hide Liquid Lapdance pants from your wife or girlfriend.

Awesome, gross, or just generally WTF?!